At first glance, skipping the lawyers and going straight to divorce mediation might seem like a sensible approach. I mean, if you have a short term marriage, make roughly the same amount of money, maybe you don't have a lot of assets to divide. Sure, yeah, in that type of scenario, divorce mediation just might make sense. But if you're a stay at home mom in a long term marriage and your husband is say a business owner with significant assets or if he's to blame for the breakdown of the marriage, odds are if you go straight to divorce mediation you're setting yourself up to get screwed over the last 20 years.

I can only think of one time right out of the gate where the woman came out on top. Think about that. Your husband's preference for divorce mediation has nothing to do with the kids, college, or saving money. It has everything to do with keeping you away from someone like me.

Someone who's going to reach deep down into his pockets and make sure you're protected. The mediator won't do that. The mediator doesn't represent you. The mediator gets paid no matter what happens.

Which, by the way, is one of the reasons why so many lawyers like doing it. It's easy. Taking matters to trial—on the other hand—requires talent. And yet, only by aggressively preparing your case for trial can you strengthen your negotiating position and ensure a fair outcome.

Yes, that's true. There will be opportunities to discuss settlement along the way, but if we do a deal, make no mistake, it'll be on your terms, not his. In a long term marriage, far too much is riding on the outcome. Your future quality of life depends on it.

You can't afford to make decisions in the dark and you can't afford to go it alone. If the financial stakes are high and your husband's pressuring you into divorce mediation, let's have a conversation. Request a free consultation today.